Write On Wednesdays Exercise 23 – Write the words of Margaret Atwood at the top of your page “We are learning to make fire”. Set your timer to 5 minutes. Write the first words that come into your head after the prompt. Stop when the buzzer rings.
We are learning to make fire
Charmaine stared blindly into the clear darkness, blinking hard to try to clarify the scene in front of her. She gripped at the rail behind her with her left hand and shoved her wispy curls into her beanie and catching a cigarette and lighter from the top pocket of her flannelette shirt with her right. Balancing with her heels she lit her smoke and inhaled smoothly.
“Caith?”
Her thin voice rang out into the shadows as she searched for his pale face. Steadying herself against the rail, she listened hard and heard the blast of the spray can and a little spluttering, then silence. She heard Caith curse and then the harsh sound of the can being shaken violently. He must be out of paint.
Her knuckles whitened as she heard a train approach in the distance.
“Caith! Train’s comin.”
She felt breathless as she crawled along the rail, slippery from the afternoon rain, in the direction she heard the spray can. We are learning to make fire, we are the revolutionaries of the now… Caith’s mantra. She repeated it over and over in her mind as she called out again trying not to yell, or sound pissed off.
Click here to link up to Ink Paper Pen‘s Write on Wednesdays
flowersinmywords 
Suspenseful. Is Caith mad or is he a determined visionary? Charmaine seems very pensive and possibly even afraid of Caith. I hope you revisit this story.
When I wrote it I wasn’t sure if he was mad or a visionary. Now I want him to be both!
Or is he going to be run over by the train – what next! great start to a longer piece?
Thanks Kate, I’m actually liking it more now than when I first published! May well continue…
Very mysterious! I like the idea of not knowing what is going to happen next. I hope you continue with this piece.
Thank you Stephanie, I liked the suspension in it too.
Sif, is there really much difference between a visionary and a mad person? 😉
This piece is very good. The suspense is well played, not overworked. The characters are powerfully introduced, their very different personalities introduced efficiently with few words.
I, too, wish to know what happens next. =)
My only “complaint” would be that the sentence “She gripped at the rail behind her with her left hand and shoved her wispy curls into her beanie and catching a cigarette and lighter from the top pocket of her flannelette shirt with her right.” is a little too long to flow as nicely as the rest of the piece; perhaps you can split it in two…
/ Rain
Thanks Rain! I actually agree wholeheartedly with your comment. I wasn’t 100% happy with that sentence but being a touch time poor, I left it.